Miriam Group

Have you ever seen a child push a limit and felt like something deeper was happening underneath?

When I was growing up, I noticed someone close to me behave in ways that others misunderstood. I didn’t have the words back then, but now I know what I was seeing. It was a child who didn’t feel safe, who was testing whether anyone would show up and stay steady.

Sometimes children don’t have the ability to explain what they feel. Instead, they act. That can look like running away, making risky choices, or saying things that scare others but are really a way of saying, 'I don’t know what to do with what I’m feeling.'

What’s often dismissed as attention-seeking is really a need to feel visible and valued, to feel safe in their body and in the world. These moments are invitations to pause and connect, not punish or push away.

Some youth, especially those from communities that have historically faced misunderstanding or limited access to care, may be more likely to have their behavior misread. Cultural and lived experiences shape how children communicate distress. Seeing these signs early and responding with care instead of consequence makes all the difference.

As adults, we now have the capacity to stay grounded when children can’t. To notice the signs. To be steady when emotions rise. To help them name what’s happening and know they’re not alone in

Every child deserves that kind of care. Every child should have a way back, not just after they fall apart, but before they do.

Because being seen and supported should never have to come through crisis.