Ready Set Grow

Reposted
Today I heard someone say, “This is how you get your body back after birth.” I threw up in my mouth a little bit.

Can we just stop with this harmful narrative about birthing bodies and bodies that menstruate?!? That some other version of this body is better or more worthy of love and care?!?! This body - THIS BODY HERE AND NOW - is beautiful, is worthy, is enough.

Let go of the past: There is no going back to my previous body.

Embrace the now: This is the body I have.

Hope for the future: Care for this body so it will serve my daily movements as long as possible.

I’m actively doing this work for myself so that my children might have a chance to opt out this stupid cycle of self-hatred and not-enoughness. Don’t talk about dieting in front of my kids. Don’t talk negatively about your body in front of my kids. I’m working so hard to give them a foundation of love and appreciation for their bodies. Every night I sing, “You are so big, so strong and so mighty! There’s nothing that you cannot do!” I better live like this is the truth for me too.

“Love your hands! Love them. Raise them up and kiss them. Touch others with them, pat them together, stroke them on your face… Love your mouth… This is flesh… Flesh that needs to be loved. Feet that need to rest and to dance; backs that need support; shoulders that need arms, strong arms… Love your neck; put a hand on it, grace it, stroke it and hold it up. And all your inside parts that they’d just as soon slop for hogs, you got to love them. The dark, dark liver — love it, love it, and the beat and beating heart, love that too. More than eyes or feet. More than lungs that have yet to draw free air. More than your life-holding womb and your life-giving private parts… love your heart. For this is the prize.” Toni Morrison, Beloved

A breastfeeding parent on vacation…WITHOUT THEIR BABY.⁣
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Yes, this is possible my friends (and necessary at times for mental health). ⁣
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A few things to consider: ⁣
• How established is your BFing relationship?⁣
• How important is it to you that it continues?⁣
• Do you have a good supply?⁣
• Do you have enough of a stash to get baby through however long you’re gone?⁣
• How old is your baby?⁣
• Are they eating solids?⁣
• Do you have someone you trust who can handle 24+ hours of baby?⁣
• Do you enjoy kid-free fun?⁣
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Now, I breastfed for over 8 1/2 years. I was confident in my supply BUT I had donated almost my entire stash, so I had to plan ahead because I’m committed to (and lucky enough to) continue nursing until my kid(s) are ready to stop. Plus, my little one was a “straight from the tap” kinda baby. She hadn’t taken a bottle more than a few times in 10 months.⁣
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So for two weeks, I pumped (which I hate). ⁣
Our regular sitter (who was going to be with baby while we were away) offered a bottle every day they were around. ⁣
We laid some groundwork and did some prep.⁣
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I hadn’t left my first two kids this young for this long, but it had been a hell of pandemic and mama needed a grown-up break like whoa. ⁣
My partner was at a work convention in Vegas and well…we made it work. ⁣
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I pumped and dumped, not because of the Corona (the beer, not the virus); I’m all about busting that myth. ⁣
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I pumped and dumped because dealing with storing and traveling with breastmilk is a huge pain in the ass and I was on VACATION. ⁣
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It was only three days and two nights but we made the best of it and we had a blast…and my babe latched right on when we were reunited. Our two older kids had a fun adventure at grandma’s and my partner and I felt rejuvenated (and perhaps a bit hungover). ⁣
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It’s possible. Life after kids is different but with some planning, some trusted help, and a small leap of faith, it IS possible to revisit the free-spirited time before parenthood. If only for a short little while. ⁣
Cheers! 🍻