KML Counseling

Some thoughts for my fellow white folks under government occupation. ♥️

One of the most simple and profound gifts you can give to someone in your life is believing them when they tell you something that has happened to them.

Even if the information they are telling you is confusing or hard or seems impossible, saying “I believe you” is necessary and important, and I’m angry it’s not the experience of many people who find themselves in my office.

When we lead with excessive questions, a face that reads suspicion or doubt , defensive rebuttals, or engage in spiritual bypassing, we communicate a very basic lack of trust, care, and empathy. We create a deep wound that takes significant time and energy to heal. Can I tell you how many sessions I have with clients where I just repeat the phrases “I believe you.” “You were right.” “I’m absolutely sure that happened to you.” over and over? Too many.

To be not believed makes us question our perception of reality, our ability to trust our own bodies and minds, and undermines our confidence and hope that anyone else might understand. Feeling unbelieved is a lonely, isolating, confusing experience.

Give the gift of assumed trust. Give the gift of suspending your perspective of the world and putting on someone else’s. Gift your belief. We need it now more than ever.

A few new faces around here! Thought I’d (re)introduce myself! 👋🏼 I’m Katie. 👋🏼 ⁣
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I’m a clinical counselor in the Twin Cities area serving adults- mostly women in their 20s and 30s. The people I work with are just like you- people who need a place to process and are working through things like anxiety, relationship issues, work/life balance, healthy emotions, etc. I specialize in Christian faith integration into the counseling process and have a special interest in those who have experienced hurt or burn out from the Christian church. ♥️⁣
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When I’m not counseling people (all online lately in response to COVID-19), you can probably find me spending time with my husband, baking ( if you’re interested 😉), running outside (I’m very slow and allergic to everything that grows, so why is this my hobby?? 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️), writing, reading, or binging TV shows (no shame in my Netflix game). And, just for my enneagram friends: I’m a 6 with a very strong 5 wing. 🥰
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Here on my insta, you can find occasional posts and stories from myself or other great sources with good tips, tricks, musings for managing healthy lives and relationships. 🥳 Thanks for being here!!

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Sometimes we think by ignoring or burying our feelings we can somehow avoid experiencing them. However, like a toddler who wants his parent’s attention, our feelings will get louder and more intense the longer we pretend they are not there. Instead, pause and listen to feeling. It usually has something important to tell us and will only start shouting if we ignore the whisper.