Benne's Blog

Growing up my dad had a diesel shop on the same property as our home. Often, he would work long hours. Early mornings into the night. He was a one man show, so if it was going to get done it was going to be done by him. In the beginning he had a direct line to the shop, 392-6150 for his customers to get ahold of him. When supper was ready we would call him and he would come down to join all his girls around the table. At some point he discontinued that number and had the shop changed to the same number as the house, he was a frugal man indeed. So mom would send one of us girls up to get him for supper each night. Then somehow it was discovered that you could call the house number and hang up at the right time and it would ring back. Dad would listen for that one ring and pick up the phone to see if there was anyone waiting to talk to him. It was a challenge to get that phone hung up at just the right time. This was our opportunity to tell him about supper or any other messages that needed to be relayed.
How times have changed. Most often that phone doesn't ring where you don't know who is calling. Which makes it quite convenient actually. It affords you the opportunity to complete a task, a conversation, or simply wait until a more convenient moment to call back. More often than not the caller will hang up and send a text to let you know what they needed. It should make us a more present society... but so often- it does not.

I had an employer at one point that would either ask for assistance, ask a question or simply be in a conversation with me and the phone would ring... and mid-sentence they would answer the phone and walk away. This phone habit made a big impact on me. It proved my value in this employee/employer relationship. Which would appear to be very little value.

I have received calls here in the shop while I have had a visitor and I simply hit the option to send a text... "I will call you back." I focus on the person that has taken the time to be in my presence. Because, since the covid crisis I have learned the value of being around people... I had missed this part of life. In person meetings! It is a true gift- a present of presence.

I had a situation occur this week that really impacted me. I was having a conversation with a friend, and they answered their phone while we were talking, ending our conversation and beginning another. I walked away thinking... okay so I have very little value in this person's day, our relationship is not what I thought it was, what is my value?

My takeaway on the phones this week is this. It does not need to replace the people who have taken the time to see me in person. It should add to a relationship -not take away.

Benne Myers, If you can't find the good, be the good.