Jason Smith - Relational Intelligence

I know he’s working on me now. This is preparation. The lesson is no matter how hard it gets we always have more to give. We find it in him, within ourselves, and the company we keep. I’ve allowed myself to be broken before and I will not allow it now.

12 days. It’s been 12 days and two ER visits and one admission since my last walk. Multiple meds. No answers. Waiting on appointments and labs. I’m hopeful but the unknown and the lack of exertion capacity is a tough one for me.

It's amazing how quickly the tide can turn in your life and in my mind all of this has been for my good. Something good will come from all of this because it has to but right now that version of me seems really far away and like the experience I'm having now in this moment is becoming a new normal but I will not allow my mind to go there. This week has been tough to go from physically active to only being able to stand a few minutes before my heart rate and bp spike again. The answer will come, more tests to come, but for now we wait and pray for an easy answer and quick fix.

BP and Heart Rate are still not cooperating. Makes you wonder how much your body can take. Down to 179lbs. And can only walk as far as the bathroom and back.

Yet, if it wasn’t for the destabilization of the BP/HR I could easily get back to normal life.

No answers. More tests in June. Just trying to make it to those appointments.

I’m sharing this to let you know that we all have life challenges and even in difficult times we must seek out gratitude and connection.