Sara Grunstein, LCSW

Some children get labelled as “attention-seeking” when their behaviour feels loud, constant or hard to manage. But most of the time, that behaviour is not about wanting attention for the sake of it. It is about needing connection, safety and reassurance.

Children do not always have the words to say “I feel left out”, “I am worried”, or “I do not feel important”. So it comes out in other ways - interrupting, clinging, acting younger, pushing boundaries, or demanding attention at the worst times. When adults only react to the behaviour, the real need underneath stays unmet.

The shift matters. When we see behaviour as communication, we respond differently. We stay curious instead of frustrated. We look for what is driving it instead of trying to shut it down. That is where trust builds, and where behaviour starts to change.

Free ATTENTION-SEEKING ICEBERG POSTER

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If you or someone you know with young children has been affected by the wildfires in Southern California, our partners at Help Me Grow National have deployed care coordinators to connect you in real-time with support and services, including food, shelter, health and mental health care, diapers and more.

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