Rambo Akpan

7 THINGS YOU MUST KEEP DOING IN YOUR MARRIAGE.

1. Be the first to say I AM SORRY: It's a show of strength to say this in your marriage.

2. Always initiate lo******ng: You shouldn't be shy to bring up a discussion about s$x in your marriage.

3. Always be willing to lose in arguments: There's nothing you gain from winning arguments with your spouse.

4. Always pray for your spouse: It's extreme spiritual maturity to intercede for your spouse.

5. Always check up on your in-laws: You're bringing more honor to your marriage and home checking up on your mother-in-law and father-in-law.

6. Always say THANK YOU to your spouse: Don't allow an entitlement mentality. Appreciate your husband. Express gratitude to your wife.

7. Create time for your spouse: Don't be too busy with work. Don't be too occupied with your phone. Don't be too rigid. Prioritize the time of intimacy with your spouse.

SILLY MARRIAGE MISTAKES TO AVOID

1. Don't ignore your wife the whole day, and expect her to be warm towards you at night

2. Don't shout at your husband and speak to him with disrespect and a tough tone, and expect he will enjoy talking with you

3. Don't be so guarded with your phone and expect your partner not to be suspicious

4. Don't be dramatic in your demeanor and expect your partner will enjoy going out on dates with you

5. Don't cheat or make your partner think you are cheating and expect him/her to easily have s*x with you

6. Don't veer away from God and expect your marriage will be exceedingly blessed

7. Don't judge your partner and keep reminding your partner of their wrongs and expect your partner will be confiding in you about their unpleasant truths and struggles

8. Don't turn down your partner's s*xual advances repeatedly and expect your partner will still desire you and pursue you

9. Don't mistreat your partner in public and expect your partner will enjoy being around you with others

10. Don't be reckless with finances and expect your partner to trust you in financial decision making

11. Don't keep ignoring your partner's requests for you to change and think your partner will keep caring. Soon, your partner will let you be and do you, after growing tired

12. Don't be mean to your partner and expect your partner to see God's love through you. Do you minister to your partner in how you handle him/her especially in difficult times?

13. Don't keep repeating the same mistakes and think your partner will not start feeling taken for granted

14. Don't push away your partner and act like you don't need help and think your partner will keep forcing themselves to be there for you

15. Don't speak anyhowly to your partner especially when angry and think your partner over will feel loved

TIPS ON HOW TO PRAY FOR YOUR SPOUSE

1. ASK YOUR SPOUSE "IS THERE ANYTHING YOU WOULD LIKE ME TO PRAY FOR?"
You have no idea how powerful that question is. It shows your willingness to cover your spouse in prayer and to care for what your spouse cares for

2. BE EASY TO TALK TO
How will you know your spouse's struggles if your spouse doesn't feel comfortable to talk to you? When your spouse feels safe, he/she will make confessions to you, pour his/her heart out to you and this precious information will help you know what to pray for

3. KNOW YOUR SPOUSE'S HISTORY
Get to know your spouse's history and upbringing. How did your spouse grow up? What struggles did your spouse have? Did your spouse suffer trauma growing up, how was your spouse's past romantic relationships? This will reveal some issues your spouse perhaps is still struggling with such as fears, difficulty to open up on specific matters, spiritual/emotional questions, etc. Your spouse might be having issues he/she is not aware of but their journey will reveal it to you. People sometimes are not aware when they are hurting

4. SPEAK LIFE TO YOUR SPOUSE
Avoid complaints and harsh words, they are contrary to prayers. But speaking life and encouragement complements the prayers you make for your spouse

5. ASK THE HOLY SPIRIT TO REVEAL TO YOU WHAT TO PRAY FOR YOUR SPOUSE
God knows your spouse better than you and even better than your spouse. If you pay attention, God will reveal to you what your spouse is going through or where your spouse should be going to. Instead of asking God to reveal to you what wrong your spouse is doing so that you may catch him/her; ask God to reveal to you how best to minister to your spouse, ask God to reveal to you the things your spouse might be struggling to communicate or is not even aware of

6. LET YOUR SPOUSE HEAR YOU PRAY FOR HIM/HER
As often as possible, let your spouse verbally hear you pray for him/her. It feels good hearing the one you love talking to God about you

7. END PILLOW TALKS WITH A PRAYER
When you two are having heart to heart conversations in bed, as you connect emotionally, also connect spiritually. Get to pray in that moment of intimacy

8. SEND YOUR SPOUSE VOICE NOTES OF PRAYER
Randomly surprise your spouse with a text of a prayer or a voice note of you praying for him/her. These are the things that lift up your spouse's spirit and keeps him/her going

9. ASK YOUR SPOUSE IF YOU TWO CAN PRAY WHEN YOUR SPOUSE VENTS
When your spouse vents about how you hurt him/her or how tough the day has been or how bad or low he/she feels; in that moment of vulnerability ask to pray. It reinforces your bond and allows God to move into the challenging times of your marriage

10. PUSH YOURSELF TO PRAY ESPECIALLY WHEN THERE IS AN OFFENSE
Many couples choose not to pray when they are mad at each other; but this is actually a wonderful moment to pray. Push yourself to pray and in your unity your marriage will be blessed. Is your spouse your enemy? Even if yes in that moment, God is asking you to pray for your enemy. We don't pray because we feel like it, we pray to connect with God and because we need God

11. DON'T MAKE JUDGEMENTAL PRAYERS
Avoid making prayers that make your spouse feel judged in the presence of God such as "God, help my husband who has joined forces with the devil", or "Or God, help my foolish wife to see what I am trying to tell her so that she grows up". Let your speech be well-seasoned and your prayers full of grace.