Life with Rayo

Do not accept all invitations.

THE WEDDING GUEST
She remembers the number of times she attended traditional wedding celebrations. That is the ceremony where the groom and his family come to the bride’s family to formalize their union. Sarah loves parties but traditional wedding parties used to rub her up the wrong way.

Things usually go well until the groom’s family are ushered in with singing and dancing. They come in singing about how they will take care of the bride. In their home, the husband cooks. He fetches water from the stream. He washes. The bride is coming to live the soft life.

Sarah looks at the bride, dancing and smiling at everyone. Instead of rejoicing with her, she finds herself feeling sorry for the new bride. In her mind’s eye, she sees the groom’s sisters making life difficult for her. The mother-in-law oppressing her and the husband not standing up for her.

Looking back, she realizes that she was projecting her own reality onto the bride. So, when she attends a wedding now, she finds herself playing a game of reading people’s faces. She tries to imagine what they are thinking. She looks at couples, and she has become quite good at guessing which marriages are struggling just by the way they interact (or not) with each other.

Sarah now knows that there are great marriages out there. She no longer feels sorry for new brides. She shares in their joy and hopes they have a peaceful and lasting union.

Are there activities or events that trigger you?

Be intentional.

Protect yourself.

Start living.

Be that person.

What you need is on the other side of fear.

Let's burn some.

THE MATTER OF THE T-SHIRT

Christmas celebrations at the family house in Ijebu were always eventful. The men come home with their wives and children. There must be one drama or another scripted by no other than the sisters-in-law. They always come home to “take care of their father’s house”.

Funke was woken up early on Christmas morning by the sounds of commotion coming from downstairs. It was Ronke screaming and cursing. Apparently, one of the sisters-in-law had come home with a young lady. On this holy morning, she thought the only thing the lady could wear in the whole house was her brother’s T-shirt. The brother happened to be Ronke’s husband. Ronke who was never one to suffer fools gladly tore the T-shirt off the lady’s back.

If someone had told Funke that a sister-in-law would think it was okay for her visitor to wear her brother’s clothing, married or not, she would not have believed it. But then, when she thought again, she realized worse had happened in this space. She recalled how her cousins found it hard to believe some of the crazy happenings she shared with them.

Do you think Ronke overreacted? How would you have handled the situation? Share your thoughts in the comment section.

This is hard on the partner.