Mutethia.co.ke

Yesterday in international news!

*ALJAZEERA reports:* Thousands of protestors get to the streets in Kenya to protest against the high cost of living, as hundreds of government sponsored goons invade Former President Kenyatta's Farm.

*BBC reports:* Hired youth trespass into retired President Uhuru Kenyatta's Farm, destroy property, cut trees and steal livestock amidst high cost of living demonstrations in Nairobi.

*CNN reports:* Kenyan government counters opposition protests by invading former president's Farm.

*SKY NEWS reports:* Kenya plunge into chaos as government and opposition engage in battles.

Yesterday I was appointed as Roots Party Coordinator-Imenti Central Sub County. I therefore dissociate myself from my former Party ODM.

I will henceforth be advocating for the Roots Party Agendas which includes but not limited to:

- Bhang/Marijuana Farming
-Snake Farming
-Exportation of Hyena testicles
-Exportation of dog meats
-Scorpion rearing
-Fight against LGBTQ+
-Fight against GMO
among others.

We shall conduct massive recruitment of members across the sub-county and other parts of Meru and Kenya.

Wajackoyah is the only remaining hope for this country after the Kenya Kwanza Government has failed to solve the Economic and Social problems of its people.

Kenya needs a different style of leadership.

George Luchiri Wajackoyah
Raila Odinga
Babu Owino
Supuu O Mioro

HER: Ghai, kwani hauna CD? Sasa tutafanyaje?

HIM: Tulale tu, there is always a next time. nitavumilia hadi asubuhi.

2 minutes later...

HIM: Si ata tu romance kisha tulale? Nishike niskie poa.

She turns slowly to his side to face him.

HER: Wueeh, na ikisimama?

HIM: Haiweziii, ni yangu naijua. Haisimamangi.

2 minutes later...

Her: Weweee, unaona imesimama..

HIM: Badoooo, inakuanga hivyo. Usijali.

He skillfully and tactfully finds his way around her underwear and rests the head of his Msilimbombo at the entrance of kīrīa.

HER: Woiyeee, Usiingishe akiii..

HIM: Haiwezi ingiaaa...

Slowly but surely, he gains headway inside the honeypot.

HER: Ghai, unaona umeingisha..

HIM: Badoooo, Wacha ikae hapo basi. Nifungulie miguu vizuri bas ni relax hapo.

She spreads one leg to give him limited access like 2G network. He capitalizes on this move and hopes that it will eventually turn her on and allow 'kitu imese mwensake..'

HER: Si unaona! aki unanifanya.

HIM: Usijaliiii, nitatoka saa hii tu..

He notices that she's no longer resisting and she is now cool and relaxed. It's all systems go.

He lifts both her legs higher than Inua dada initiative ever did under Jubilee government.

9.98 seconds later...💦 💦

He falls off from her and pants in fast shallow breaths, like a child with 'Rimonia'.

HER: Nilijua tu hivyo ndio ulikuwa unataka..

HIM: by the way Ulijuajeee... Aki