Boss Days Out

Trigger warning: suspected breast cancer / health anxiety 🤍

After finding a lump, I heard the words:
“We’re putting you on the cancer pathway.”

And honestly, I thought that meant I had cancer.

It wasn’t explained properly to me at first and I completely spiralled.

I had Mikey with me in the doctor’s office when they told me and I broke down crying: “I can’t leave Mikey, he needs me.” It affected him too.

I took a week off work because I was genuinely paralysed with fear. My brain went straight to “what if?” and I couldn’t think beyond it.

I barely told anyone because even talking about it triggered me.

I tried to distract myself however I could.
I started eating healthier.
I changed my routine.
I went shopping.
I booked massages and reiki trying to calm my nervous system.
I forced myself out with friends.
I dragged myself to a comedy show just to laugh again.
I cuddled Mikey tighter than ever.

But behind all of that, I was still crying when I was alone, googling symptoms at night and convincing myself my life was about to change forever.

Waiting for answers is its own kind of trauma.

Today I finally had my appointment and cried right before going in. But I met another girl there for the same reason and she was an absolute ray of sunshine.

And today, we both got the all clear 🤍

I wanted to share this because being put on the cancer pathway DOES NOT automatically mean you have cancer. It means they want to urgently rule out anything serious and double check you properly.

If you ever find yourself in this position too, I see you and you are not alone 🤍

Bank Holiday Dump 🗑️ ☀️