Marli Rusen
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Marli Rusen brings years of extensive experience as a labour, employment and human rights lawyer to her current work as a third-party educator and problem-solver. Marli has effectively transformed her legal knowledge and understanding of workplace dynamics into proactive, practical and timely "tools" to assist parties with the informal and formal resolution of their complex workplace challenges an
05/15/2026
In my work, I commonly encounter two different types of dysfunction that work together to divide relationships and teams. The two individuals involved in this dynamic are respectively perceived as the "needler" and the “burster".
The burster is the individual who loses their temper, says (or emails) the wrong thing (or the right thing at the wrong time) or otherwise engages in direct and tangible behaviors that are viewed as inappropriate and disrespectful. Many times, this person is almost exclusively held to blame for conversations, meetings and relationships that have gone sideways.
However, when dynamics are fully and properly investigated, a separate and more subtle form of dysfunction becomes apparent: this is the “needler". The needler quietly creates stress and anxiety for others: they ignore certain requests for assistance, they fail to respond to questions (from specific people), they selectively refuse to share information, and often fail to do what is being asked of them without saying a word. Their silent dysfunction is noticed – not in any “tangible” behavior – but in the damaging impact caused by their lack of responsiveness, consistency and transparency.
The bursters either experience or observe this happening – and also notice that nothing is being done about it. And then, as you guessed, they "burst". They react by sending the inappropriate email or making the insensitive comment. And then, the needler complains.
Hasty leaders will say "Look at that burster – they are at it again". Responsible ones will say – "Look at that burster ... it’s not okay, but let's consider all the circumstances to better understand what might be happening". When done properly, most reviews of this nature end up holding both individuals accountable for their contribution to the unhealthy dynamics.
In order to reach defensible conclusions, it is critical for investigators, leaders and HR to have open and curious minds from beginning to end. Workplace inquiries are not about finding out "who dunnit" – they must learn all about the "dysfunctional pie" and figure out who owns what piece of it.
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1321 Blanshard Street #301
Victoria, BC
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