Jessica Okonski Photography

I am just going to place a bunch of random photos here today from June. Why June? Well for me June was when the current, I dunno, let’s say miasma started building. The news of the inevitable countdown hadn’t even been realized yet, and somehow.. June started the preparation for me. It was a shift.. I felt it. And here we are.

I put these random photos together in July after the text, “stopping treatment” came in. 

Countdown begins. 

What do you do with that? Where do you put that knowing? And in that all encompassing knowing.. who cares about making sense, when really nothing makes sense. You struggle, you find peace, you struggle again, you find peace again.. shift to shift to shift. We are so fluid aren’t we? 

And then here we are in August, and less than 48 hours into it.. the countdown struck zero. The knowing became the known. The countdown changes from “how many days/weeks/months till…” to, “how many days/weeks/years since..”

I guess not surprisingly.. this side of the countdown is the same. Struggle, peace, struggle again, peace again… 

so I write this for my mother. He was her partner. He was her love. This is really her grief I share -that I hope I can help carry, maybe.. 

I mean, how does this all work really? 

Photos shot for and

I’m going to say something controversial, yet brave… I love everything I do 😂😂 Photography, woodworking, cycling 100km, running, long walks with Adam, reading, tarot pulls, my journal, my therapy sessions, dressing up, dressing down… I love it ❤️

Shot for
❤️