YEMAYA MAMA

🔥5 years ago- I was holding my newborn baby boy in bed paralysed with nerve damage in my sacral plexus, with excruciating pudendal neuralgia and radial nerve injuries from labour and birth…it left me bedridden 24/7 for 3 months with some sustained nerve injuries. I had to have Ashley hold me upright to go to the toilet, I was lying down breastfeeding my newborn and drowning in PTSD, grief, shock and despair followed by 5 consecutive viruses that year. I even researched wheelchairs and thought this was my fate. Such longing to become a mother and yet confined to the bed for an unknown length time with months of insomnia and obsessive night terrors. I was so broken I had no way out and I thought I would never have joy or any positive feeling in my heart ever again. Drowning despair was my end game.

🦋The Gift- Last night I am with my 2nd newborn baby (whom I birthed on the soft grass in my garden with my best friends) and it was an ecstatic and surreal moment in time and I experienced a flood of gratitude in my whole being as I DANCED and HELD my baby standing up, using my LEGS and being held by my beautiful partner Ashley celebrating our TEN year anniversary with Ecstatic Dance and Kirtan with Dancing Dhevas

It is possible to bring the soul back into the body, and it is possible to heal from complex PTSD. It takes a lot of deep inner work and letting go and reclaiming Life back.

I have reclaimed my Life back in so many ways. I thought I’d be back in the soil but not yet… I have a lot of more life and abundance and gratitude to bring in.

Simplifying every aspect of my life and having a small circle of what and who that matters in my heart. I love my soul family.

Everything else is fluff 😂

I am so grateful to have had this beautiful soulful big hearted boy choose me as his mama. We are so blessed. He is such a delight and of pure joy and wonder. He is so caring, creative and strong. We had a wonderful celebration with over a dozen of his gorgeous little friends and we played many games and enjoyed our new backyard made by his papa bear. It is a reflective time for me as I tenderly hold myself during this rite of passage. It is also the same day my childhood friend died, 8 years ago. Self Compassion flows into me during this time to call in Spirit to heal us and all our relations. So much to be grateful for and may we all return to love and show up for each other. I love you my boy and you are my sunshine 🌼 Happy Birthing Day to Us 🦋♥️ #loveheals #wildandfreekids #wildandfree #motherhood #thebeautyway #homeschooling #natureschooling #compassion #pnd #postnataldepression #perinatal #postpartum #woman #birthmatters #ptsd #ptsdrecovery

TRUE SISTERHOOD We are stronger together;
Women who;
-have the courage to be vulnerable, authentic, heart centred in communication, not of envy, competitiveness nor being diminishing of others
-with reflective awareness, sit in the discomfort, still honouring each other & do not project the disowned parts of ourselves onto others. There is no judgement to deflect the mirror of self
-seek deeper understanding & ignite compassion instead of succumbing to Self righteousness
-let a sister bring her shadow into the light & witness her with love & support
-tenderly hold each other during grief & sorrow. With love, she is never too much
-courageous, kindness & honouring
-are aware & let go of assumptions, belief systems & indoctrination masking her fear

Pride & prejudice is hypocrisy of the Self. It dismembers your heart from true intimacy with yourself, with life, with Great Spirit, with friendships. There is a lot of talk about “wanting community “ but are you going to show up, commit to Self healing and growth & open your heart & mind to a new way of living & relating? No more blame shame drama, your ego not in the driver’s seat, no hypocrisy of polarities which are all inside you as shadow cannot exist without light. It all needs to return to love. Do you love your arm but not your leg? Do you accept parts of your Self & disown the rest? You cannot be whole without acceptance. You cannot have community thriving if the offended ego wants to burn others to the ground. Rising in love & exploring deeper understanding creates compassion & harmony. Sisterhood is showing up. Showing up for yourself & others during the discomfort, held in love. Mean girls are detrimental to conscious evolution as community can’t flourish with hatred & the children suffer

In love, reverence & solidarity, I only surround myself with those who are present in their heart & have the integrity to show up and embrace what is. Are you ready to celebrate each other & create magic or do you want to stay stuck in a loop?

Gratitude to my sisters in the new paradigm ♥️

Artist