Coaching Through Cancer

Hello Friends,

As promised after our last update, Tony and I quietly slipped into our normal day to day, finding comfort in the basics of every day living. We took some much needed time to ourselves to recover and find our new normal and it’s been a wonderful, peaceful time. For most, that would sound strange, that normal, every day living, would be a wonderful and peaceful escape…but for us, we were happy to step back into “normal”! We both needed time to recover from a challenging first half of the year.

Hard to believe that almost 3 months have past since we shared an update with everyone but here we are! Tomorrow is Oct 1st, summer has passed and we are ready for “fall” everything!

Tony is in full Iowa Football mode at work and was happy to have a few free weekends before the next home game. I’ve been busy with work and tailgating (while he’s AT work!)!

But to the point that you all are here for….”How is he doing??!?”

Well…he’s doing great! We had scans and results on the 19th and we were VERY pleased to find out that everything is STATUS QUO! 🙌🥹 NO new spots. NO measurable growth. NO changes! 👊🏻

We did ask about the possibility of having the lymph node on the right side of his neck surgically removed, the one that has had little change (which is not bad!) since we started this - we will find out on Thursday if that’s a possibility. We aren’t certain if they will simply because of the scar tissue and complexity of the location. But, it never hurts to ask the question.

He has been seeing wound care weekly for his left leg, where they removed the bone to rebuild his jaw 3 years ago. The scar tissue there has no feeling however because they removed so many lymph nodes from his neck and we also believe that with the trach placement there have been some “structural” changes, that his lymphatic fluid has no where to go but out that scar in his leg.

It progressively gotten worse after the trach placement and so his care team sent him to wound care to fix him up. It’s is getting better, however will take time.

Other than that, he’s been doing amazing! We are staying busy with normal life stuff and just simply living…it’s been wonderful. 😌

We have a couple of projects we’ve been working on during our “downtime” that we are excited to share with everyone soon!

Until then, keep living your every day, normal, amazing lives, one happy day at a time, friends. That’s what we will be doing and loving every minute. 🙏

🤟🏻 Stacey and Tony

Hello everyone! Yep, Tony here! I need to reach out and let everyone know a couple things from this past week and my life the past 6 years….

In my past, before Stacey, my kids were my rocks, my anchor point. That hasn’t really changed but life or our vision of life changes. My 2 oldest flew the nest to pursue their lives and are doing incredibly well! Wyatt in Chicago working at Rose Mary’s a very up scale restaurant, which I highly recommend. He is chasing his dreams and I couldn’t be prouder of him for that. My daughter, Olivia is a manager at the new Single Speed in Des Moines. This is a brewery which again she busts her butt and does very well managing at least 20 people and keeping the place together with events and the like! For being as young as she is and managing, that’s a special person. Stop in if you are ever there, food and beer are amazing!! And my youngest, Gabe. He is out on his own, taking the route I pursued back in the day and is in his second year as an electrical apprentice with Local 405 in Cedar Rapids. Again, proud to see him striving out on his own. His relationship with me is so different than my other 2, but he is my mini me. All 3 of my kiddos are special and I miss times we shared years ago. When my first cancer go around hit with treatments, my kids and my mom were my anchor, my rocks, my help. Wyatt and Liv were already out pursuing there dreams and college, mom accompanied me to each treatment and Gabe, well that kid watched over me like a hawk when things got harsh from the treatments. He definitely grew up in a hurry from that. Everyone likes to see their kids do well in life but I have to brag, even being from a divorced situation, we, the kids’ mom and I, worked together to raise and teach all the core values of being great individuals! My kids are my life, my everything! Didn’t know that love can be so grand and to say I am proud of each of them is an understatement. Words cannot express my feelings!

Now jump ahead to my jaw reconstruction and this woman from my past enters my life, again. I never knew that you can love someone like I do her….my kids I love unconditionally but her, it is a love that has no definition. I’m here today because of her. Looking back to last week, I just kept trudging forward but she put her foot down last Thursday. I cannot say thank you enough for her knowing I was in trouble, because I just thought it was part of the process of the chemo from my past experience. That day was one of my best friends funeral’s and I really, truly feel everything happened on that day because of his guidance and Stacey loving me and understanding me.

Love has sooo many different definitions, and I thought I understood and knew that definition but…..then Stacey. Again, I cannot put into words my feelings for her. She has stood by me from day one. Even before she moved back, I had that difficult conversation once we knew the cancer was back and told her she didn’t have to be with me, she didn’t have to move back. She never batted an eye or hesitated. If I remember right, she got mad and was upset that we were even having that conversation. Again, part of love that has no words.

People, I have learned in my short life that things in life change, switch, stop, grow, continue and progress whether you want them to or not. The things I do know…..my rocks. They may have changed or evolved, grown or been replaced, but they are my foundation. My family, Vic and his wife, my parents, my kids, and Stacey. My foundation that is a base for growth and development. I’m not going anywhere and will fight for everything until my last breath, you can believe that. I’m not incredible, just a man that is trying to live his life, even through these imperfections. My base helps me with those imperfections.

Moral of my story……build your foundation and keep it solid. Even if something happens to one of those “rocks”, either fix the issue or replace it. Nothing is forever. Live now, don’t wait….let those know your feelings and talk to them regularly. This “I don’t have time”……well we all are on these phones and can take 20 seconds to send a message. Like Stacey said, tomorrow is not a guarantee, ever!

All my friends that have followed us, the prayers, thoughts, all of that feed the universe and we gladly take them. I’m hopeful we have great messages moving forward and not scary ones. I love each and everyone but most importantly…..my rocks I love so much. If you are married, give your significant other a squeeze. Stacey, can’t imagine my life right now without you….. I. Love. You. Wife!