GC JiuJitsu

What is strength? Is it going to the gym and building muscles so one appears to be the master of the body or perhaps it’s learning a discipline so one knows how to defend themselves! I worked my whole life to achieve strength or at least what I considered strength to be. Yet my whole life I was dying on the inside. Trauma ruled me and dictated my actions on a daily basis. Substance abuse became my false idol and my only reprieve. I had that horrible victim mentality and with that negativity I became my own volunteer to my destructive behavior.

How do we change? For me the healing process was long and drawn out. Getting away from the two men that terrorized my youth my freshman year in high school. My Aunt Sherry and my Cousin Kelly showed me love and acceptance. Going into the Marines after I graduated where my mentors taught me perseverance and tenacious resolve to progress. Post service and most recently was when I had the biggest revelation. I finally started vocalizing all the deep dark s**t that I had locked away my whole life! I came clean about everything in my past that was keeping me sick.

I wake up everyday feeling blessed for my life in recovery! I start everyday with prayer and gratitude for the life my God has so graciously bestowed upon me. Then I thank him for the people that push me to new heights in all aspects of life!

Huge shout out to my friend for the invitation to his open mat at the in Liberty Lake. He is a world class black belt and someone I look up to and admire! Always a joy to scrap with some of the most savage grapplers in the PNW.

I was terrified to get back into hot yoga after I got out of rehab last year. At a whooping 350lbs it was hard to do anything at that size, but I showed up. The first month was beyond challenging. I wanted to quit but the community pulled me through. They treated me with kindness, love, and compassion. The instructors showed me patience and the yogis cheered on my progress! I learned to be patient with my body and to honor it where it was. I fell in love with my body all over again and believe me I didn’t have anything kind to say about how I looked when I got out of detox last year! Pictures turned out wonderfully by from the Yoga for Jiujitsu class that my dear friend .mimi taught last week!