Dating Can Be Fun

On the subject of kissing…just in case it’s on your mind:

In Hell and Other Destinations: a 21st- Century Memoir by Madeleine Albright, the author shares with us her experience is giving commencement speeches. Since I’m a Dating & Relationship Coach, this grabbed me:

“A friend compared the challenge to that of kissing. In a romantic mood, one wants to surpass expectations, but there are perils associated with trying too hard, and there are only so many ways to go about the procedure. Just stay on topic while avoiding tightness requires a rare combination of imagination, felicitous timing, and dexterity.“

Think about that next time you plant your lips on another’s two lips. Annnd, if you hear a compliment that you’re a great kisser, pause a moment, and realize it takes two inventive, caring, and sensual mouths to make for good kissing.

Do you notice people who make eye contact with you? Is it easy and natural for you? Or, are you often looking away when you're in conversations...too shy or uncomfortable?

Of course, we all know staring, even "eye stalking" has its limits too. Still, we all want to be "seen and acknowledged" so, if remembering to do what the formerly shy actor, Austin Butler, does, I think more new relationships can ignite and old ones, deepen.

Here's a paragraph (link to whole article below) explaining (if you will, a trick or device) to ease yourself into eye contact:

"He explained that this connected gaze, which he learned in an acting class, helped him conquer a once-crippling shyness. 'If every time I feel attention on me, I start to feel like I’m imploding, then I just need to put my curiosity onto the other person,' he said. The people who’ve worked with Butler tend to mention that curiosity. They also describe him as 'thoughtful' and 'kind'..."

NY Times: The Careful Crafting of Austin Butler

The Careful Crafting of Austin Butler “Elvis” and “Dune” established him as a chameleonic movie star. Now, with “The Bikeriders,” something closer to the real Butler is being revealed.

“Post s*x communication may therefore serve an important role in not only sustaining a satisfying s*xual relationship between partners,” writes the researchers of this 2016 study, “but may also contribute to more general feelings of relationship satisfaction and closeness.”

And if you want to read the entire article:

After S*x Pillow Talk Offers a Scientific Commentary on Your Love Life Post-coital conversations are driven by emotions, sure, but also a lot of chemicals.