Single Parenting Solutions

Today was our first day back to school. As single parents, we know those mornings trying to get out the door, juggling everything on your own can be extra stressful.

I have to admit I was not at the Pinterest level of preparedness like others I see on social media…No back-to-school breakfast or fancy signs. Yet, it was a surprisingly smooth morning until I prompted Little Dude to put on his shoes.

From the bottom of the stairs, I heard the words that co-parenting parents dread… “I don’t have my sneakers, they’re at Daddy’s.”

I was getting those last “grownup of the house” things done…turning off lights, throwing dishes in the dishwasher, and found myself going down a spiral of blame, which looks like a “you should know better” conversation in my head with Dad.

As I was about to give my zinger, I heard, “It’s okay, I can just wear my golf shoes!”

Damn.

What a humbling, yet proud experience being schooled by an 8-year-old in problem-solving.

Reflecting back, I asked myself if I would have gone down that spiral if the shoes were at anyone else’s house…
Or, if these were my shoes, would I have had a whole conversation stomping around the house shaming myself?

Nope.

What this tells me is that my frustration about the shoes wasn't really about the shoes. It was my own crap creeping up with Dad. My own crap that could have prevented me from connecting with my son on our way to his first day of school.

Thanks to him, he showed me what was really going on…
Not some war between parents,
But simply…

The shoes aren't here, so how can we solve this problem?

The moral of this story is that it's easy to let your grown-up crap interfere with your relationship with your children. It takes work and even when you think you’ve done a lot of it… there is still more to be done. But this is the good kind of work😉 The work that everyone reaps the benefits from.