Seattle Birth Co

After supporting hundreds of women in Birth… after my own births… after witnessing the beautiful, the chaotic, the sacred, and the heartbreaking — here’s what I know now:

• You cannot control birth. You can only embrace it.
• A calm nervous system in the room matters more than the perfect birth plan. - this!
• “Natural” does not automatically mean empowered.
• A respected cesarean can feel more powerful than a chaotic unmedicated birth.
• Doulas don’t save births. Women birth their babies.
• Experience changes how you hold space — you speak less and observe more.
• Fear is contagious. But so is steadiness.
• Hospitals are not the enemy. Egos and protocols are.
• Preparation is important. Surrender is essential.
• The birth itself is only the beginning — how a woman feels about her birth will stay with her forever.

Early in my career, I thought my job was to protect a vision.

Now I know my job is to protect the woman inside whatever unfolds.

Birth will humble you. Every time.
And if you let it — it will shape you into someone softer, wiser, steadier.

And motherhood?
It keeps teaching the same lessons.

🤍

A birth that wrecked me.

Every doula has that client—the one who somehow slips past the thick, protective layers you’ve built around your heart and nests deep inside it. The ones who ask thoughtful, meaningful questions. The ones you feel safe being fully yourself with. The ones who do everything you advise —the nourishment, the movement, the body work, all of it—because they want a good birth so badly.

And then… they end up in the 30 - 39%.
The people who welcome their babies via C-section.
The one thing they tried to avoid.
The one thing you all worked so hard to avoid.

Hearing a doctor say, “We only push for two hours at this hospital,”
“The baby is not going to come out vaginally,”
“Your pelvis is too narrow”—
was heartbreaking and defeating. It knocked me off my feet so completely that weeks later, I’m still recovering.
My heart breaks for women who hear these words from the OBs….

Words like these are powerful.
And they are traumatic. They stay with the mother forever and they tell her “you failed, your body failed”.

This mama ultimately did have a C-section because she developed an infection—and it was absolutely the right call for her baby after more than three hours of pushing. She went all the way. She fought a good fight.

At a prenatal visit, she told me she felt cheated out of the experience—because she didn’t have a vaginal birth, she felt like she hadn’t really been welcomed into motherhood. She didn’t earn it.

And this is what I told her:

You labored for over 36 hours.
In countless positions.
You delayed pain management.
You pushed for more than three hours.
You advocated.

You fought for a vaginal birth—and you came so incredibly close.

In my eyes, you had two births.
You made it further than most mothers ever do—even those who end up with vaginal births.
You triumphed against the odds.
And you did it for your daughter.

Our eyes filled with tears.
There were no more words. Just hugs.

Birth changes people.
But please—I beg you—let it grow you, not destroy you.

That’s advice I’m giving myself today, too. 🤍