WithVixx

Basically make your cake and eat it too. 🖤

🖤

Coworker: “My sister had a baby so we all went to Charleston to visit her and her husband.”

Me: “wow, that sounds nice!”

Coworker: “Yeah, it was good to see everyone! Anyways, good luck with your presentation this afternoon!”

…As soon as she walked away, I peered around the corner to make sure I was really alone, that’s when I let it out. Just a few hand flaps, in private, to release the tension.

What tension? Well, I’m autistic, the conversation itself doesn’t have to be tense for me to feel tension.

I feel it when I have to look people in the eyes.
I feel it when I have to give polite responses.
And I release it in small ways when no one is looking.

Autistic people often experience emotions at a higher intensity.
And for some, there’s a delay between the experience and the resulting emotion.

It's actually a skill…the ability to get through something tricky and then feel it afterwards.

Oftentimes, it's the cost of doing business in a world that wasn't designed for brains like ours.

As it pertains to autism in the workplace, I want everyone to know that having a reaction is not evidence that a person can't handle the job. It is evidence that they care about it.

If I’m going to have social interactions with my coworkers, the associated cost is the buildup…as well as the eventual need to release the resulting tension.

For me, the reaction afterwards, be that - hand flapping, crying, or something else…has always been part of the deal. What goes up must come down.

That said, everyone’s tolerance is different. If the resulting fallout is causing harm, then a change might need to be made. But for me, this is just how it is, tension, and delayed release.

I don’t have all the answers, but just know, some of the toughest battles are won when no one is looking.

P.S.
I train teams on how to support their autistic employees. Book me by clicking the link in my profile! 💗